Something to share about

 

life goes on

this semester just gets rougher.. not tougher yet

it comes to realization of mine that actually I do have free time, not that busy, perhaps the time hasn’t come yet hmm?

well if I got time to complain about things, then I must have also have the time to do something about it right??

that’s all folks~~

Windows live Writter

Which provides convenience for it’s blogger to write/share their views without browsing the internet beforehand… hmmm

 

Well Hello again ^^ How long has it been? since 2010!

Wowww… It has been that long already??

 

Yeah right, sorry my Foot!! Why should I be sorry? Hmm?

It took (and still am) to figure out about the future of this blog of mine. I’ve read all of my previous post, just one page behind though, not that bothered to read more of them >.>…

Since the past years of being student, the final hurdles has come… soon, my final season of being an university student has come to it’s “full bloom”… well.. almost, 1 more semester to go~~ And to be honest, I can feel myself growing:

but well…

A truth that can never be denied, for sure… I’m not that daring to say that I’ve matured throughout these years, but somehow growing up is and still there, regardless of age/mentality/values/attitudes….

^_^

I'm lucky enough to breathe, able to eat, healthy body, perfect senses and limbs, a decent face, a good family and friends and a peaceful country, I'm just lacking on realization of these facts ^_^

p/s: keep on chanting how wonderful your life is, its the best life I ever living now

Its Been a while..... heck a long time ^^"

Heya Bloggie..

Kinda missing writing smt to share about,im not the type of being outspoken or
"outminded" whatever the term is... It's just that, it happens that I wanted to tell smthing that I might read it again in the future u know?

I've been enviously admiring everybody that i know, and I wish i knew them. They seem so....happy with their life, being together with friends, their loved ones, kinda jealous by looking at their smiling faces, and is secretly wishing I have the same thing as them..

I've been reflecting myself a lot, I realized that I don't express much about myself, its not like I don't want to, but I prefer being reserved all to myself.. Don't speak much, till reality hit me!! Bang!! I think I'm being timid!! The worst kind of timid, who doesn't want to admit that she's super duper timid ayayaiii!!!

Ya I kinda hate that part of me, it does affect me in several ways, nowadays I rarely communicate enough, just take my roomates for example, I knew their name and that's it!! I don't know who they are, whr they're from blalblabla.... the same as I don't like to share my background with others till i treat them the same way too.. *sigh*

Then I realized that I was too late.. to change myself, the thing is when Im not willing to do smting, I really don't.. I'm just not that friendly enough, and hates to talk too much, my introvert side still stay strong within me... until I finally realized, I don't have anybody close, even my parents.. don't get the wrong way, I love them but I don't feel connected at all.. whenever there's a conversation, I am the only receiver, they are the sender.. most of the time, its not that I can't express myself, but I don't know what is the best way to do so.

Being fake is what I've been doing lately, doing silly jokes js to make others laugh is the least thing I can do to have a bit spark in my life, smile whenever I felt like when I was actually angry, chatting nonsense with others but at the same time worry about the worst possibility, whatever the situation is....

Maybe Im js confused, maybe Im js afraid of losing, maybe I just don't care

MAYBE its time to have something meaningful in my life.. MAYBE I NEED U... BUT WILL U RESPOND??

I know I am NOT in love but........

God, why such feelings come again, I don't need it, I want to love, but not infatuating again!!! I love him because of his babyface looks yet sexy voice?! You Devil!! Is this ur next plan of becoming reckless in self indulgence? Please I don't want it!! Not this sem, fed up already of feeling the same, this childish crush, how many time you inflict me on this, for the fourth time already!! Geezzz

p/s: wat an emotional post, sry ^^;;

The hardest thing to do is actually to love those who hated you~~

Well this post is not solely regarding to that title above, there are lot more to told about.. but my mind is currently imagining the 2nd commandment of Jesus Christ, which is to LOVE others as He had LOVED everyone..

Seriously, that one is the one I'm still struggling to make up for, as a human being I can't run away from evil feelings such as dislikeness, jealousy and even hatred, I dont particularly hate someone at the moment till I wish that person death or something.. but there's something deep inside which is terribly ugly which only myself are able to understand, and hopefully God understands too..

I cried out, not begging for forgiveness or anything.. but cried out in guilt, wondering why the hell do i have to feel this way, I kept wondering why i childishly dislike someone especially when they seems better than me, especially the ones that Im hoping to be, really hoped to be..*sigh*

Been wishing since forever to ease out these feeling.. maybe it won't fade away, I sincerely hope this evil feeling of mind don't hurt others psychically or emotionally.. I pray to GOD for this.. amen

Peristiwa Check in..

This time I shall write in Bahasa Melayu loghat Sabahan kay? My accent is not that great but at least its not complicated compared to Swakian slang, its was pretty hard for me to understand until now hehe..

Ne sebenarnya sambungan creta kami bertiga dari Borneo yang mau check-in ke bilik masing2... setelah merempuh perjalanan selama hampir 24 jam campur masa tidur kami sana airport.. akhirnya sampai juga kami ke kampus yg "disayangi" ini.

Tapi

Kami telah ditahan oleh pegawai keselamatan sana dekat depan library , bukan jg dia mau tahan kami ka apa gia, dia sekadar tanya psl tujuan kmi dtg sne kampus sbb sepatutnya suma pelajar senior diberi permission tuk check in kampus punya hostel pd 10hb... adui kitaorg suda booking tiket awal2 ba abang, tu announcement sna e-com pun baru keluar 2-3 hari lepas, padahal awal bulan lalu lagi ktorg suda start booking tiket, yalah kalau book awal2 tambang masih berpatutan, kalau last2 minit mau book, menangis owh duit terbang byk2.. tu pun nda suda ambi flight dr KL g kuantan pakai MAS, jln p kuantan naik bus, belanja kampus makin lama makin tinggi owh, sampai skarang masih lg dsponsor parents, sian sa tingu dorang berabis cari duit bha, jgn la ba kasih susah dorang sgt dalam hati sa bilang..

K k bebalik kepada peristiwa check in tue, nasib la abang guard tu sangat understanding pasal situasi kami bertiga, so dipendekkan creta ktorg lapor diri dkt jhepa pastu dorang bagi lar pas khas supaya taula kami ada hal masuk sne u awal.. smalam ada jg fasi Minds wat inspection smalam di bilik, nasip la ada tu pas, silap2 kana halau kami/ nda pun kana lecture, huhu sa knal jg tu fasi walaupun dia nda kanal sa langsung, dia paling tegas dalam pemerhatian sa dalam sesi Minds tahun lepas, tahun ne dia ikut jg rupanya, huhu mmg aktif pla dia tue..

Oh ya, sa suda check in, kawan sorang lg tumpang sa, tp ada bekas rumate sne, nda tekemas brg2 dia, so pas contact dia, dia akan kasi kemas lg brg2 dia, rupanya dia nda jg duduk sna, kwn dia pla duduk situ, tp duduk lg di bilik lain, aeekkk patutla teda org masuk bilik masa tu, hish2 nda paya la panjang creta pasal ne..

Habis suda creta psl check in, yg penting ada bilik suda bha, nnt ada lg kwn mau tumpang bemalam di bilik sebelum tarikh rasmi check in.. pastu akan dtg jg rumate2 sa yg sebenar, mcm nda sabar pla jumpa ngan dorang, ada perasaan bercampur baur jg sbb ne kali rumate sa macam jg dr golongan rumate sa ms 1st sem, tp junior ma, snang sket la tu...hmmm... harap2 la huhu

peace n out~~

A new semester has begun again!!!

The day started pretty late for my journey to go back to campus, It was the last flight on 6th from 9.25 till midnight, along with my 3 other friends, one of them was invited by their relatives to stay at KL with them, so she will go back later than both of us. Luckily one more was there to accompany us to go to KL taking the same hour of flight in Swak, so in ratio 1:2.. 1 Swakian and 2 Sabahan, all girls huhu..

Once we arrived at airport, we asked around the bus station outside, about how to go to Kuantan, in other words, which route should we take to reach the bus terminal to take bus there. But since Puduraya the main bus terminal was/still shut down for upgrade, there were two other destination left, Pekelling or Anjung Putra (Dont really remember the exact name) according to one of bus attendant there.... Hmmphh the bus attendants were really something, one was busy playing sudoku who didn't care much about our questions while the other one was mocking my Sabahan accent (I was the one who asked), wow what an interesting mentality, 1 Malaysia kunun, but making fun of others because of our own identity, should I speak English then? even Malay pun can't understand ka??

Enough with asking, we decided to stay at airport since it was too early to take bus there will be no bus to go to Kuantan anyway from terminals, moreover the fees to go there (terminal) was expensive, around RM18!! Better if we take airbus RM9 then take monorail RM2.50, then arrive at pekeliling.

So the morning came, It was a hectic nite, not being able to sleep properly because we have bench and floor left as our sleeping place haiyaa, so better than floor which is really cool, we sat on the bench sleeping till the morning come. We took the airbus, then monorail, till we arrived at Pekeliling, took the bus at 9.30.. then finally arrived at UMP around noon, hoorayyy

Well not yet until the check in process...hmm will continue tommorow if my memory still fresh about it la.

A brand new start!!!

Just now I changed my blog layout into more relaxed feeling ones taken randomly from blogspot designer. This blogging thingy isn't over yet, and Im kinda feeling hopeful, to someday being able to BE what I truly want to be.. someday, *sigh* such a unpredictable phase don't ya think?

Haiyo, haiyoo.. and haiyo.. what have i done previously through my blog.. god dammit such a unexplained matter to elaborate with ^_^;;

Fuck up mind continues again XD

emo... layan ja la emo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now possibilities I'd never considered
Are occurring the likes of which I'd never heard
Now an angry soul comes back from beyond the grave
To repossess a body with which I'd misbehaved


yeahh she came back, hurry up with your revenge!!!! He deserve it anyway, so it seems like lose2 situation, and hell i like it!!

Smiling right from ear to ear
Almost laughed herself to tears

Must have stabbed him fifty fucking times, I can't believe it
Ripped his heart out right before his eyes, eyes over easy
Eat it, eat it, eat it

Equality never seems so good >.<

Now that it's done I realize the error of my ways
I must venture back to apologize from somewhere far beyond the grave

I gotta make up for what I've done
Cause I was all up in a piece of heaven
While you burned in hell, no peace forever

Well too late my dear, cause I'm coming to give back what you've done to me wahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

waihh the rest was just the repeat of chorus of "baby don't cry" then these line comes up...

I will suffer for so long (What will you do, not long enough)
To make it up to you (I pray to God that you do)
I'll do whatever you want me to do (Well then I'll grant you one chance)
And if it's not enough (If it's not enough, it's not enough)

If it's not enough (Not enough)
Try again (Try again)
And again (And again)
Over and over again

We're coming back, coming back
We'll live forever, live forever
Let's have wedding, have a wedding
Let's start the killing, start the killing

~~ a fuckin happy ending I guess~~~