seriously my EQ at lowest level at the moment...

I met Prof just now, after numerous attempts to set an appointment with him, finally when I myself am not prepared, I collect my guts to meet with him today..... then I did met him, all I felt(until now) was a relief, regret, sad, disappointed, glad and many more the mixture of it.. moreover, strangely I wanted to cry for being able to finally met him... why the heck I feel emotional about this?.. I wonder...

It was a relief to meet him, because I can discuss about our topic and finally get a clear path of it, I felt regret because I don't meet his expectation, I was sad because I just can't face him the way I faced with my friends, and I'm disappointed because the way I behave during my meeting with him... I act like a "chicken" in front of him..

I was swept away by his tough kindness, he helped me on my materials on what should I read for my group's research, he even printed some for me. Maybe to him, Its just normal to help his students his way, but to me, I felt appreciated, touched by such an act..

Seriously I was brainwashed by how we "ice break", then using his ability to dig out every "bad side" of me, which I myself don't realize and I'm shocked by it... This meeting has definitely a kick start to form a new me.... but I need some time for that..

P/s: Thanks be to God for this day!!!